Forgotten Memories
When you're trying to remember what you just remembered four seconds ago.
Signs Of a Struggle
My housekeeping style is best described as "There appears to have been a struggle."
Putin Puzzle
The moment you realize Putin is 5 letters and could be the daily Wordle.
Autopilot
When someone tells me to have a safe flight, it's like OK, I will do my best. But just so you know, I'm not the pilot of the airplane.
Poker Face
Worst poker face ever.
Making Bank
Started to go to the gym this morning and couldn't find my membership card. A new one is $10. A donut and coffee were $3. Guess who saved $7.00.
Ticket to Ride
She's got a chicken to ride. She's got a chicken to ride. But she don't care.
Wordle
Tordle 248 4/6.
Aye Captain
Her: I thought you didn't like Wheel of Fortune? Me: I'm not changing this channel until I see this guy ask for an "I."
Git'er Done
There are no limits to what you can accomplish when you're supposed to be doing something else.
So Scary
This is her first hunting mission. Pretend you're scared.
What a Gas
Stop driving for the next two weeks and we can flatten the curve on gas prices. It's the decent thing to do. It's not that hard. Just stop driving. Be kind. You not driving lowers my gas prices and me not driving lowers your gas prices. Not driving is the only way to show you love your neighbor.
Bad Moos
Your chances of getting killed by a cow are low, but never 0.
Just Don't
Whenever I'm trying to spell unnecessary, I just hit N, C, and S until auto correct kisses me on the forehead and tells me to stop.
Premium Unleaded
Her: What is that beautiful scent you are wearing? It smells expensive. Him: It is, it's gasoline.
Curator
Most of this work or writing, punning, sarcasm, or dad jokes is not original content from me. I appreciate the finer art and curate or collect from various sources on the Internet. All original copyright notices are reflected in the images and the watermarks for the images. Feel free to follow me at the links listed below, or email me at Tom@ThatPunGuy.com.